The clumsy dance of the colours and patterns of life

Witness the clumsy dance of the colours and patterns of life, the sometimes-harmonic, sometimes-cacophonic combination of the silence and the noise all around, and the heroes and the helpless within.
Welcome to my little corner of The Mighty Interwebs, where it is not likely you will find anything profound (or even very interesting), but where you will find all manner of random. Life is a kaleidoscope of the weird and the wonderful, the awesome and the awful, the blessings and the bizarre, and the collision between them is what you just might stumble upon here if you stick around. Grab your favorite drink and come hang out with me if you dare.

Wednesday, September 15, 2010

Peter Panism: A Lesson Learned from my Grampa Ed

What is it that makes growing up a scary thing? Is it fear of facing the unknown? Is it the necessity of taking on responsibility and consequently giving up a care-free attitude in life? Why did Peter Pan want so desperately to avoid this thing we call "growing up"?

The third decade of my life has come to a close and become my history. I am looking to my future with eyes no longer a child's, yet there exists in me a childlike excitement that can't be quelled. I'm the first to admit that getting older is a scary thing for me. "Growing up" is an idea beyond the reaches of my imagination. It's not because I desire to shun responsibility that I don't want to grow up, but rather it is the appeal that the security of youth holds for me, where things happen the way they are supposed to.

Having goals in life is always a good thing. My personality (bordering on OCD in many ways) makes it hard for me to start working towards a goal of any sort without something to mark the beginning of that journey. Closing the chapter of my life where I can check the box for 24-29 years old on surveys means venturing into a fresh new chapter. Not with a sense of morbidity, but for the sake of having direction in my life, I took some time for myself and jotted down a "thimble list." (That's like a "bucket list," only smaller. Except it seems my thimble is an awfully large one!) Some 65 goals made my list, goals I want to accomplish - or at least attempt - between my 30th and 35th birthdays. Everyone's goals are different. My spirit doesn't crave adventure, so skydiving, space travel, or mountain climbing aren't here. Instead, my list largely stays closer to home. Home is, after all, what I crave more than anything: a place where I feel like I belong, a place I can settle and be me. It's no surprise to me that the first goal that my mind recognized is to build a house. I've been dreaming up house plans for some time, and now I've giving myself 5 years to take them from being seedling ideas to sprouted, if not fully grown, reality. Without defending them or justifying them, my list of goals for the next 1826 days follows. They are in no particular order. Big goals are mixed in with small ones. Some are quite serious, others are certainly silly. My Grampa Ed lived with the philosophy that "we have no choice about getting older, but growing up is optional." With a mix of trepidation and excitement, I am setting out on my journey of the next 5 years and the goals I hope to reach. Onward and upward!

Build a house
Design a garden
Refinish 6 wooden chairs
Sew a quilt
Make a swing
Really learn to play my accordion
Learn harmonica
Learn guitar
Learn autoharp
Join a choir
Run a 5K race
Save an emergency fund
Pay off my student loans
Take a photography class
Have laser eye surgery
Record with Oak Jam
Read John Senior's list of great books
Start a business
Run a 1/2 marathon
Make homemade yogurt
Take Ukrainian dancing
Be a waitress
Take accounting classes
Make wine
Research my family tree
Sleep under the stars
Learn basics of dance
Take fitness & nutrition classes
Learn to draw
Learn to paint
Photograph the Northern Lights
Take a First Aid course
Learn to knit
Learn to swim
Make a hammock
Photograph a beautiful rainbow
Buy a bike
Carve a pumpkin
Write a real letter regularly
Dance in the rain
Take a graphic design course
Make a piece of jewelry
Read all of A.A. Milne's books & essays
Grow an herb garden
Photograph a lightning storm
Take Ukrainian lessons
Write an icon
Walk/ski/bike to work when I can
Write an article and have it published
Donate blood
Make a calendar of my extended family's birthdays and anniversaries
Capture the beauty of an Alberta sunrise on film (well, okay, in pixels)
Grow raspberries
Host a cookie-exchange party
Make a cookbook
Prepare - and stick to - a budget
Have the confidence to wear a white two-piece bathing suit
Host a semi-formal dinner party
Grow rhubarb
Have fresh flowers in my house every month
Build a website
Make a rag rug
Perfect a bread recipe
Give of my time to help a charity each year
Build a wagon-wheel bench
Send Christmas cards
Can my own fruits and vegetables

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